Crazy crazy nights and a fractured mind

So, as I (im)patiently await March 17th, I had been simply writing mostly to my blog and not much else. Today that changed. I had not planned on beginning this project yet; there is another in front of it. But it seems that mainstream wants to push itself to the rear and bring my less mainstream thoughts to the forefront.

Some time ago, as I was driving home, up over Cornell on the way from Swan Island to Beaverton, this thought crossed my mind as I went past one particular stretch which was road with a steep drop off and no guard rail just inches away from the edge of the road. What if someone faked their own disappearance because they were just so sick of the shit that their life had become.

Yes, this is how my mind works. And, to be fair, long before Gone Girl I had these thoughts, disappearing on purpose. Creating a new you because you hated what you had become. I thought of this concept as far back as 1986. Also, to be fair to Gone Girl, my imagined ruse was not designed to blame someone else and ruin their life; it was imagined as a form of existential angst. So often we hear people say "what if I had it to do all over again?" Well, in my mind, this is an exploration of someone who does just that.

So, that was supposed to be behind a project I had already started some early development on, including a strong opening. Today that ll changed. The muse, she is strong, willful and, well, sometimes she is just a bitch. Today, she was all of the above.

I sat down and started writing a dream I had which I thought would be a perfect story to include into this plot line. Now, nearly 1700 words later, I have a good start to this story.

The story starts in Columbus, Ohio, with an amnesia victim who will end up tracing himself back to this original point. I have no clue what he will find as, like always, i want this story to grow organically, and not be a pre-determined ready-for-television concept. I write best when I free flow the story and let it grow. I the go back and do a rewrite as I edit out any conflicting statements (i.e. if I were to say 12th street in one chapter and fifteenth street a hundred pages later) and develop a little more depth within each page.

Oh muse, why do you fuck with me so? Oh well, at least my muse is still talking to me!